Today may very well be the last day I am here since I am expecting to float away sometime tomorrow. However, since I am still here I decided to make one last blog post before I float away.
Approximately one month ago was the shitshow that is collectively referred to as Rutgersfest. This event holds dear to me because it was basically my last big party as a college student, and coincidentally enough my last year as a college student was also the last year of Rutgersfest...ever. Now I feel especially sad today, but I'm not sure if it's because of this or if it's because of the fact that I'm expecting the world to end soon. But I decided to personally do what I can to bring back Rutgersfest by offering some key suggestions. (This is all of course hypothetical, because in order for Rutgersfest to exist, the world itself needs to exist.)
1) Give out free drinks on the buses/student center/on the street. This is actually the complete opposite of what Rutgers tried to do. They lied to themselves by saying that they would be fighting to stop widespread consumption of alcohol. All the kids with bottles of Gatorade, Red Bull, and orange juice were probably mixing these drinks with something more potent. I am using myself as a source for this information. But now here's the trick. Rather then discouraging drinking, you should encourage it. In fact, you should get all the guests so bombed that they will struggle to do much of anything. But think about it. Extremely drunk people cannot fight each other. They certainly cannot pull guns on each other. In fact, about all they can do is drunkenly stumble around aimlessly, which poses virtually no risk.
(Key word: virtually)
2) Hire police to do things other then control traffic. Now I certainly have no problem with police controlling traffic, but when there is an event like a Rutgersfest you have to focus your efforts on other things. Before the event began, all the talk was about all the beefed up security and about how much police would be present. Then when the event actually started, I don't know if I witnessed enough cops to start a pickup basketball game, much less control a crowd of 30,000 kids. In fact, the presence was so weak that many people felt the need to lash out against cops and yell and scream at them. (Alcohol may have had a part in this.) Such hate towards the police has not been witnessed since the NWA days. But the point I'm trying to make is why situate all the police in a single area, especially to do something like control traffic and direct cars. I witnessed so many fights that day, and it seemed like the police did not want to waste precious resources to jump in unless somebody was on the verge of death or weapons were involved. Now, I am not a doctor so I have no authority to say this but I feel as if getting your skull flung against the pavement is potentially harmful to your long-term health. But who can blame the police for not breaking up more fights. It's not like the cars and buses were going to navigate the streets by themselves.
3) Hire professional fighters to walk around the streets. The problem with 30,000 people getting drunk and wandering around is that there is a lot of testosterone flying around. Many of them are probably far too drunk to go to their gyms, so they turn to the next best thing; beating the shit out of people. Walking on College Ave, you could tell people were looking for fights. They would intentionally bump into people, insult people's jerseys, or yell obscenities at walking by pedestrians. Eventually one crazy person would find his perfect match, and an absolutely pointless fight would ensue. This was certainly entertaining to watch, but I could definitely see where the safety concerns would come from. That is why I think the school should hire professional fighters/boxers to walk around the streets and act as regular drunk idiots. Now I am not saying get Mike Tyson to walk around New Brunswick; he is far too noticeable and who the hell would start a fight with Tyson. I mean find some washed up fighters who may be a little out of shape from overindulging on donuts to overcompensate for the fact that their careers went down the trash. Now just imagine how perfect the scenario would look. The seemingly tough guy goes to pick a fight with one of the fighters, and ends up getting laid out with a single punch. Nothing says no to pointless bullying/fighting then a swift uppercut to the head. I could certainly see potential legal issues developing with this one though.
4) Bring a bunch of really old people to play at the concert. One of the complaints I hear all the time is that all the modern day rap artists that perform at Rutgersfest draw in potentially dangerous people. By potentially dangerous people, they actually mean black people, but they simply take the politically correct route. Unfortunately for them, rap is the mainstream music of today and that is why so many concerts feature rappers. When you consider that Rutgers is a college filled with 18-22 year old students, then you realize why so many rappers are featured in these shows: it's what draws the largest crowd of people. That is where my idea comes in. Rather than focusing on drawing in artists that would attract college kids, turn the show into something like the Superbowl halftime show. Bring in a bunch of really old artists who get applauded for merely being able to stand on their feet without collapsing. College kids would have no desire to go, and the fields would be filled with retirees and students' parents rather than the actual college kids. The fear of hormones getting out of hand would be replaced with the fear of potential strokes and deaths from too much exposure to the sun.
Well here's to dreaming that Rutgersfest is present once we are all raptured and brought into heaven. I personally, have very fond experiences of it, which made their way onto Youtube.
Then again, just being present at Rutgersfest might mean that there is no hope to be saved.
Well that was a nice distraction, but now it's time to face the end of the world. Thanks for your support everyone, and I hope all of you are brought into the sky tomorrow.
(Key word: virtually)
2) Hire police to do things other then control traffic. Now I certainly have no problem with police controlling traffic, but when there is an event like a Rutgersfest you have to focus your efforts on other things. Before the event began, all the talk was about all the beefed up security and about how much police would be present. Then when the event actually started, I don't know if I witnessed enough cops to start a pickup basketball game, much less control a crowd of 30,000 kids. In fact, the presence was so weak that many people felt the need to lash out against cops and yell and scream at them. (Alcohol may have had a part in this.) Such hate towards the police has not been witnessed since the NWA days. But the point I'm trying to make is why situate all the police in a single area, especially to do something like control traffic and direct cars. I witnessed so many fights that day, and it seemed like the police did not want to waste precious resources to jump in unless somebody was on the verge of death or weapons were involved. Now, I am not a doctor so I have no authority to say this but I feel as if getting your skull flung against the pavement is potentially harmful to your long-term health. But who can blame the police for not breaking up more fights. It's not like the cars and buses were going to navigate the streets by themselves.
3) Hire professional fighters to walk around the streets. The problem with 30,000 people getting drunk and wandering around is that there is a lot of testosterone flying around. Many of them are probably far too drunk to go to their gyms, so they turn to the next best thing; beating the shit out of people. Walking on College Ave, you could tell people were looking for fights. They would intentionally bump into people, insult people's jerseys, or yell obscenities at walking by pedestrians. Eventually one crazy person would find his perfect match, and an absolutely pointless fight would ensue. This was certainly entertaining to watch, but I could definitely see where the safety concerns would come from. That is why I think the school should hire professional fighters/boxers to walk around the streets and act as regular drunk idiots. Now I am not saying get Mike Tyson to walk around New Brunswick; he is far too noticeable and who the hell would start a fight with Tyson. I mean find some washed up fighters who may be a little out of shape from overindulging on donuts to overcompensate for the fact that their careers went down the trash. Now just imagine how perfect the scenario would look. The seemingly tough guy goes to pick a fight with one of the fighters, and ends up getting laid out with a single punch. Nothing says no to pointless bullying/fighting then a swift uppercut to the head. I could certainly see potential legal issues developing with this one though.
4) Bring a bunch of really old people to play at the concert. One of the complaints I hear all the time is that all the modern day rap artists that perform at Rutgersfest draw in potentially dangerous people. By potentially dangerous people, they actually mean black people, but they simply take the politically correct route. Unfortunately for them, rap is the mainstream music of today and that is why so many concerts feature rappers. When you consider that Rutgers is a college filled with 18-22 year old students, then you realize why so many rappers are featured in these shows: it's what draws the largest crowd of people. That is where my idea comes in. Rather than focusing on drawing in artists that would attract college kids, turn the show into something like the Superbowl halftime show. Bring in a bunch of really old artists who get applauded for merely being able to stand on their feet without collapsing. College kids would have no desire to go, and the fields would be filled with retirees and students' parents rather than the actual college kids. The fear of hormones getting out of hand would be replaced with the fear of potential strokes and deaths from too much exposure to the sun.
Well here's to dreaming that Rutgersfest is present once we are all raptured and brought into heaven. I personally, have very fond experiences of it, which made their way onto Youtube.
Then again, just being present at Rutgersfest might mean that there is no hope to be saved.
Well that was a nice distraction, but now it's time to face the end of the world. Thanks for your support everyone, and I hope all of you are brought into the sky tomorrow.
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